I had a fight with my husband today. I was being ridiculously stubborn. For those of you that know me that probably doesn't come as a surprise. I had been a little rough with one of our kids and he told me that I needed to apologize to her. Well, I set my heels in and refused. We had a discussion about it in private and where I continued to be stubborn. He asked me if I thought that I was acting in a Christ-like manner in the way that I was treating him and Faith and I went so far as to say that I didn't know how Christ would respond in the situation. It wasn't until he told me that I was really upsetting him because I'd never lied to him like that before that I snapped to my seances. I apologized (to him and Faith) and made things right.
Through this fight I realized that I often don't care as much about God's feelings about my behaviour as I do about Joel's. I wonder how much of my good behavior is a result of my selfish motivation to have a happy marriage and other happy relationships and how much is based on my love of God. This incident seems to suggest the former. I think that my selfish desire to win the fight overruled my desire for a pleasant relationship with Joel or God. It wasn't because of Joel's reminder that I was acting un-Christlike that I apologized it was because I was reminded that I was damaging my relationship with Joel.
Walking with Jesus is hard. I feel depressed sometimes when I realize how sinful I still am. It's sure a beautiful thing to remember his awesome grace.
Posted by rose at March 7, 2005 09:41 PMJesus doesn't care how sinful you are. He cares that you love your husband and child and are doing your best to follow His teachings. We all fail and falter along the way, but He's always there to pick us up. Walking with Jesus is a a whole lot easier than walking without Him.
I was reminded today by the votes on both bankruptcy and the minimum wage how hard it is for our representatives in Congress to remember that Jesus loved the poor and mercy more than wealth and greed. I wonder if they'll burn in Hell for favoring the rich. They have a lot more to worry about in terms of getting right with Jesus than you do.